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| In This Issue: | Front Page Archive |About the Babbler Links to Avoid | ||
Meijer proposes underground store in Lisle Conservative hackers attack Babbler web site Bears hope to play a pre-season game on the moon Alderman wants to ban Spanish in Chicago Ask Sheila Bolingbrook in the Bible Confessions of an Adultolescent Ticked-off Ted God to Smite Bolingbrook on 12/1/07 © Copyright 2007 |
'Aliens-only' warehouse endangers Earth A Broken Force Fields special report
Located on the outskirts of Aurora, the Cummings Logistics warehouse seems like all the other warehouses near Route 59. Aurora UFO watchers, however, say this warehouse is most dangerous place on Earth. According to Dean Higgins, president of the Aurora Sky Watch, the warehouse is home to an aliens-only storage area. Higgins says it is intended for alien freight that can be stored on Earth, but is too dangerous to be released into the Earth's eco-system. "We're talking about everything from Weapons of Mass Destruction to toys made on toxic worlds!" Said Higgins. "This is dangerous freight that has no business being on Earth!" According to Sky Watch, the warehouse began accepting alien cargo in 2006. Since then, Sky Watch say the area averages 20 UFO sightings a day. That would make Cummings Logistics the third busiest Urban UFO base next to Seattle, WA and Bolingbrook. Sky Watch's resident psychic Johanna Elton says human government officials never inspect the cargo going into Cummings. "The Men in Black just speak with the alien representative once a day, and then leave. No government official knows what's being stored in that base!" Elton says that due to warehouse's psychic shielding, she has been unable to look inside the restricted areas. Jesus Hernandez of Aurora Human Militia fears that Cummings could be used as a staging point for an invasion, or as an entry point for illegal space aliens. "We don't know what's going on in there, so we have to assume the worst!" Said Hernandez. "The government seems to trust this private contractor to act in humanity's best interest as opposed to the company's interests. For all we know, they could be profiting off the trafficking of illegal space aliens. Some of these aliens could be spies, paving the way for an alien invasion. This warehouse screens people going in, but they don't even count the number of people leaving!" Elton believes that the warehouse only defense against an invasion or outbreak is a small neutron bomb. If detonated, it would destroy all life within 10 miles of the warehouse, but preserve the buildings. "They have no problem killing off their employees, and most of Aurora just to save their own butts!" Higgins feels that Cummings Logistics is exploiting Aurora's economic situation. "Aurora is a poor city with a high unemployment. So they need all the money they can get. Cummings probably thinks that if things go bad, they'll only have to kill some poor minorities. This sickens me." When The Babbler tried to visit the warehouse, we were not allowed inside. Dave Appleton, spokesperson for Cummings, denied the existence of an aliens-only warehouse. "Let me assure you that our corporate values would not allow us to endanger the human race." Said Appleton. After saying that, a UFO flew over the warehouse. "What a funny coincidence." Laughed Appleton. Please note: All stories and characters on this web site are works of fiction. |
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